Restaurant review – Marco Pierre White Steakhouse Bar & Grill, Ferensway, Hull, October 2022

@RogerCrow

It’s one of those autumnal Sundays when the heavens have opened; there’s so much standing water on the roads, it’s a wonder a Beach Boys tribute act weren’t playing by the side of the surfing trucks. 

The reason for our 20-plus mile trek to Hull is to try out the Sunday lunch menu at Marco Pierre White Steakhouse Bar & Grill, and I’ll be honest: given the weather, I had thought of cancelling. 

But press on we do, and after parking at the Doubletree Hilton car park, and getting soaked navigating our way round the block, before long we have a window seat, a menu and a chance to dry off at MPW’s.

Marco’s Mixed Roast

Two years earlier, almost to the day, we had reviewed the same Marco Pierre White restaurant. It was that strange time between Covid spells (not like we’re out of the woods now, obviously), and the novelty of going for dinner anywhere was still fresh. It’s good to be back, though naturally there a sense of deja vu. 

I start with Marco’s Classic Caesar Salad, which is a great way to ease into the meal, as is the jar of potted olives. Couldn’t taste the Caesar’s avocado, and no sign of a hen’s egg as promised on the menu, but the salty anchovies were a great counterpoint to the Parmesan and lettuce. 

The restaurant is as delightful as we remembered, with its stylish decor and comfortable seating. The staff are also friendly, which is essential. 

Rachel’s Beetroot and Goat’s Cheese Salad with candied walnuts and merlot vinegar also goes down rather well. 

Zaid, our waiter, does a terrific job throughout the afternoon, and not long after we ordered, Rachel’s Wheeler’s Fish Cake with soft boiled egg, sauce tartare and buttered leaf spinach proves to be worth it. 

There’s a little too much sauce; more seasoning would have helped, but it’s beautifully prepared. 

My main is splendid: Marco’s Mixed Roast with pig in blanket, Yorkshire pudding (naturally), roast potatoes, and sides of delicious veg, including garden peas, sage and onion stuffing, baby carrots and braised red cabbage with a hint of cinnamon. We also order a side of crispy onion rings, which are crispy and delicious. And best of all is that gravy, which is a welcome relief after weeks of making my own from granules.

Rachel’s Apple and Almond Crumble with ice cream also proves a winner, despite the fact Yorkshire’s most outspoken custard advocate is denied crème anglais. As she was last time. 

When I look back on my previous review after the meal, it turns out she ordered exactly the same thing for all three dishes. The one overall opinion is she would have loved a veggie version of my traditional roast, but sadly not an option here. 

So, more choice for vegetarians would go down a storm, as well as custard with dessert, but their Sunday lunch (three courses for £27.95) is worth every penny. 

A word to the wise: if you do park at the Doubletree Hotel car park (it’s around a fiver for two hours, though there are cheaper alternatives), don’t forget to ask for the code before returning to the gated entry. At least the rain had cleared as I trekked back to reception to do just that, and after the mother of all Sunday lunches, I was glad of the brief walk. 

The restorative power of a terrific Sunday lunch in a great restaurant is worth its weight in gold, and you don’t need to be King Midas to eat at Marco Pierre White’s. Just go hungry, and prepare to be dazzled. 

Ends

Film review – Raw Deal (1986)

Starring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Darren McGavin, Kathryn Harrold

Directed by John Irvin

By Roger Crow

Classics like The Terminator movies, the Conan films and Total Recall (‘90) were played on hard rotation in my house back in the day. Raw Deal is one of the few early Schwarzenegger movies that passed me by, until now. 

The plot: dishonoured and forcibly retired from the FBI on grounds of excessive brutality, Mark Kaminski (Schwarzenegger) is demoted to Sheriff in a small town, where his wife heads for the bottle while his career goes nowhere.

However, when the son of old friend Harry Shannon (Darren McGavin) is killed while guarding a mob informant against the criminal outfit led by Luigi Patrovita (Sam Wanamaker), Kaminski is given a second chance. 

Charged with infiltrating and single-handedly bringing down the mobsters without the protection of the FBI, Kaminski assumes a new identity. He must also resist the temptations of the mysterious Monique (Kathryn Harrold, on good form) and maintain his cover, with eyes on reinstatement and a return to the life that was taken away from him

The Austrian oak plays a crime buster so cool he lights a massive cigar as a perp tries to flee from the authorities early on. Said stogie is thrown on a seemingly normal puddle, but of course it’s flammable and stops the fleeing villain. Hurray for Kaminski. 

His domestic life is far from harmonious, but when his boozy trophy wife throws a chocolate cake at him, our hero comes out with the classic “Don’t drink and bake.’  

(A shame that clip is never shown on Bake Off.)

It seems Kaminski also has the ability to start any random vehicle just by getting in the door. Witness the moment he drives a pick-up truck into a shop window, gleefully causing carnage. 

Raw Deal is basically a series of action set pieces linked together. And oh boy, it’s as stupid as a box of frogs, but strangely watchable. 

I’m sure it’s no coincidence that chords from The Terminator keep popping up on the soundtrack. And those gags and one-liners; they all land like parachuting elephants.

It’s intriguing to see Robert Davi a few years before playing the arch villain in Licence to Kill, which featured a similar ‘good guy undercover with mobsters’ premise. 

The 4K UHD version looks and sounds terrific, and scrubs up pretty well for a 37-year-old movie. Yes, Arnie is still learning the ropes acting-wise; this is four years after playing Conan, and he seems to love dressing up in fancy suits after a few years of loincloths, leather and combat fatigues. Oh and the Chicago locations aren’t bad either. 

Just when you think things can’t get any cheesier, a shootout at a graveyard leads to one character’s overlong death scene, and another’s under-stated reaction to his potential demise. “Oh it’s all right,” he remarks like he’s just got an inconvenient paper cut rather than life-threatening wounds. 

And then there’s a gloriously stupid scene in a quarry with our hero driving around killing bad guys to the Stones’ Satisfaction. I laughed out loud at the sudden arrival of a digger which stopped Arnie in his tracks. 

Following a Casablanca-style finale, the epilogue is a weird close for any action movie, bordering on satire. 

It’s one of the most eighties action films you’ll ever see, and a marked departure for director John Irvin, who helmed TV’s Tinker, Tailor, Soldier Spy adaptation. It’s also a little on the nose when we see ‘Irvin’ emblazoned across a factory’s highly flammable structure.

A big, daft, weirdly compelling slice of hokum which, in the hands of James Cameron, could have been something really special. 

Brains in neutral, settle back and enjoy the madness. 

Cast 7

Script 6

Rewatchability 6

Score 3

Editing 5